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Who: Rumer Willis
Where: At a pool party at Las Vegas’s Marquee
Diagnosis: Serious trauma to all bystanders. There’s no doubt Bruce Willis and Demi Moore‘s daughter is seriously fit, and she seems like a lot of fun. But there are better ways to show off both of those things than pairing a triangle bikini top with a low-slung sequined mini, grandma-style knit duster, belly chain and clunky men’s-style sandals. Pool parties are supposed to be relaxed, but this is exactly the opposite.
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Prognosis: Rumer, no one is suggesting you need to go Full Montag to have fun poolside, but perhaps you could communicate ‘Look at my amazing bod’ just as well in a cute print two-piece and sheer cover up. And please do revisit this photo showing how good your hair and shoes can be, and toss those fried extensions and smelly sandals into the pool.
–Alex Apatoff
Tell us: How would you “cure” Jolie’s outfit?
