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Drew Barrymore Pens an Opus on Egg Sandwiches

There comes a time in a celebrity's career when she must attempt to Goop, but each Goops in her own way. Blake Lively decided to create a general place upon the Internet that is a web site, but not a lifestyle site, just a brand she thought ought to exist. Jessica Alba opted to create a pricey lifestyle brand for people with no purchasing power.

Drew Barrymore seems to be making her effort in the realm of food and beauty things. She has joined Refinery29 as an editor-at-large, and for her first post, she wrote 1,000 words about making an egg sandwich

First, Drew Barrymore wants you to know she's just like you, because she can't cook, she is "not fabulous," and she wishes that she were:

One more thing: I really did fantasize about becoming sexier in the kitchen once I'd mastered those culinary skills. But, because I was not relaxed, there was (and is!) no sense of effortlessness when it comes to cooking and me.

So how did that go? Well, she found her calling in the kitchen, but she still doesn't do it with the right level of sultry spice:

Truthfully, I am still only great at one-dish, one-course, one-pot meals. I love soups and pastas, slow-cooked pork tacos, and meatloaf. I am still intimidated in the kitchen, and, sadly, I am still not sexy in there, either.

She does, however, ask a lot of questions. Deep questions, about existence and eggs and birth and life and creation and atoms and implosion and the universe and the big-breakfast-bang theory:

To be honest, breakfast is something that always trips me up, because it’s the one meal that usually revolves around eggs. What would we do if eggs were taken off the table? I feel like the breakfast universe would implode, and we would all be left feeling lost — and hungry.

Whoa, Drew! You're getting a little into it for so early in the morning. Do you have a way to ease us into this?

(First things first: Grab a nice napkin — even if it's just you, treat yourself to a morning moment.)

Napkin's in the lap, questions about ovoids and the universe are on the brain, crossing fingers that you get your kitchen groove back. Best of luck! Check in with you later about mid-morning snacks and the human condition.

Read more posts by Maggie Lange